Re: I need to make some changes
I was reading paco’s post and I was about to send an encouraging email only to find their blog doesn’t have a way for me to contact them.
So I guess I’ll make one of those “Re:” posts that are getting so popular around here. In this case, I’ll try to add my two cents and hopefully get to paco.
Sometimes I need to slow down, take it easy and accept I cannot always work at 100%. That's ok.
Yes. That’s very ok.
What if I get used to work at 20% of my potential, thinking it's the best I can do?
20% is a lot. 1% is a lot. There are nuances, not everything is best or worse (actually those are just constructs of the mind).
looking back I'm always disappointed in myself
You may need to find a way to work on this. It’s addictive. And it’s bad for you.
I forgot how to put real effort in a difficult task. Or probably, I forgot why it matters.
Very few things matter. And I say that in a good way.
Why it's important to work for meaningful things.
Meaningful things find you while you work, not the other way round. Also, important is a big word. I think it should be reserved for the very few things that matter in life.
[Working for meaningful things is] the only way to build a meaningful life. It's not handed to you. You have to work for it.
I may repeat myself but meaning is shown when you are awake and present. It’s not something you can “build”. I mean, you definitely can help, but being anxious, afraid or unhappy definitely won’t help.
I fear, deep down, I don't care to achieve things anymore, I don't care for success or anything else related.
Sounds like you do care. You wrote this post, didn’t you?
Or maybe I'm scared of putting in the work and still fail.
We are all scared of what may happen if. By being present, your mind doesn’t try to go and predict what may happen if. Fear is reduced to ashes.
Either way, the result is that I am not happy with how I do things right now. I need to make some changes.
Definitely. If you’re not happy, you need to make changes. Can you control it? Maybe, to some minor degree. Most of the things you can do are related to taking care of yourself (health, physical and mental, both are one) and then working on what you truly enjoy (hint: you can find ways to enjoy a job you don’t like because it let’s you do other things that not only you do like but you enjoy and they release you from the concept of time or suffering).
I hope some of the points are made resonate with you whether is paco reading or not.
Thank you for reading.
A|
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Further reading
Relaxing is NOT a waste of time